On resolutions

Plus organizing lessons from a former mess

Generally speaking, I don't like New Years resolutions. I am one of those people who posseses the, not so uncommon, gift of self-reflection. You start asking me about the things I would like to change about myself and I could give you a list a mile long. I have a list of things to try, a list of things to stop, a list of things to get better at... Its all long term stuff too. And, my experience with "resolve" is that it is a short term plan. It's a sprinters sport. Resolve is that thing that gets the guy who catches the pass into the end zone. It's when one of my babies is hurt and I need to jump into action and not burst into unproductive tears. I had to do this just recently when I was by myself with the kids and Charlotte fell and broke her nose. I got her up of the floor grabbed a rag and some ice for the bleeding, called my best friend to come watch the other kids and got up to the ER. Resolve. Yep. And, it lasted only as long as it took for her to get looked at and for us to get back home. As soon as that girl was in bed I collapsed in tears. Resolve has eveything to do with short term energy and no worth whatsoever for the "pace yourself" parts of life. Experience has taught me this. Failure has taught me. Addiction has taught me. So, resolve? I will save that for the things I absolutely have to do right now. Its serves us well for the unexpected moments but wears out quickly and leaves us drained. 

Long term change, growth, that is another story. I wrote a while back about how I did not start out being the most capable person on the planet. I couldn't figure out how to clean my room let alone a whole house. I didn't understand words like "organize" and 'schedule". But, life has taught me. Every new experience and change has been an opportunity to learn how to do it all a little better. Progress not perfection and one day at a time. I remember feeling like a failure at early points in life and trying to cling to that reslove thing to change myself long term. I will now be organized!!! I will live on a schedule! May as well have required my self to know molecular physics... right now. Art came naturally to me, daydreaming, imagination and almost nothing else. It's still the way I am, but I have, very imperfectly, learned to work at the other stuff. And, it seems like it is really starting to make sense. One of my biggest goals for myself  is to continue learning and getting better at this "organized" thing. I have picked up one or two tricks here and there and am little by little adding them to my life. Sometimes I forget, sometimes I regress, but, I have made enough progress that I am firmly rooted in the belief that it is worth while to keep at it. I have examples!
(If you are a naturally neat and organized person some of my revelations will, no doubt, seem small and ridiculously obvious, but I will put them out there anyway. Try to understand)

1. When I leave one room for another and I see something that belongs in the room I am going to - I pick it up and take it right then.

2. If I empty the dishwasher when it is done (not when the sink is full of dirty dishes with no place to go) it's way less time and effort. I can load it up as we get dishes. This way I'm spending 2 minutes at the sink here and there, instead of an hour when I finally get tired of it.

3. I work better at jobs I hate when I time myself. Sounds dumb, but if I am standing in front of  a pile of clean laundry and I start the timer on my ipad, all of a sudden I have the motivation to get it done quick. Now I'm racing me. Doing this, I learned that it takes me only about 5 minutes or less to fold and entire load. From that, I have learned to have a better attitude about laundry. I have five minutes at the end of the day. No problem. It helps when it doesn't look like Mt.Everest.

4. Give me a present. Okay, so I got through school today. I kept up with the house a little at a time and thus retained a sense of visual calm. I folded a load of laundry and gave it to the kiddos to put away before bed. Then, after they went to sleep, I did one more five minute job, swiping down the bathrooms while Scott cleaned the kitchen and dinner things. Now I sit with my computer and my feet soaking in a concoction I learned how to make on pinterest. I paint my nails and watch something on netflix and I don't feel guilty doing it like I would if the house looked like a torpedo hit. 

These are a few of the things I learned one at a time by doing it all the hard way first and then discovering what was easier. Not resolve, just patience and a desire to learn. The new thing I am working on? I got a planner and I'm using it. I know you probably got one and used it and learned how to function without it by high school, but again, this is me, Mrs. Organizationally Challenged. I was inspired to do this when my friend showed me the one she got from the Erin Condron website. It's pretty dang awesome and custom made to her specs. I might be ready for that next year... maybe. But, I'm doing pretty good so far with the one I got. Maybe if it works for me I'll splurge on the nice one next year. I mainly have trouble keeping track of "To-do" and "shopping" lists. And for planning out things like dinners - which you need to do when you are doing groceries on a budget and when you are too busy to think about it every night. So, I kind of custom fitted my organizer with "Post It" notes. It's slightly tacky, but I saved myself $50. Here's what it looks like...

In the front, I rubber banded an envelope for keeping receipts I need.

Then I have the whole month spread out with events at the top and dinners at the bottom. I put in a lined sticky note for my "Month To Do" list and have been happily crossing things off the list. (Usually my "to do" lists are spread between the counter and the fridge, my purse, pockets...) 

My week pages are for more detailed day to day: what I want to do with the kiddos for school, appointments etc.

I also put a sticky in my weekly section for a grocery list. I usually do my grocery shopping on Monday when the girls are in ballet, so I get my list based on what I wrote for meals. After I get the stuff on my list, I throw out that sticky so it isn't in the middle of my schedule and I put a new one in the next weeks section. This way, when I run out of things in the kitchen during the week, I can add it to next weeks shopping list before I add my meal things to it.

So, that's it. This is my goal for 2013. I guess you could call it a sort of resolution, but for me it's more just taking some of the things I learned over the last few years and keeping them all in one place. Baby Steps. We'll see if it helps enough that I am still at it by December.